Scheming

My brain works always in the 'is there a business there' 'can I do it' 'whats the potential' 'how much work is involved' mode. Dragons Den is my favourite show,along with American Inventor. Don't get me started on inventions,I have been there invented the t shirt,the machine it was printed on,the packaging and a unique delivery system. I told you NOT to get me started.

I dreamt up one scheme once,where I would get freelance photographer (or people who were as desperate as me to get money for their photos,to give them their correct title),to take candid photos of good looking young ladies,then get them to sign a model release form. Then get their details and ask if it was ok for us to pass on the picture to a model agency.

I planned on getting a cut from the model,if she went to the agency and the agency if they used them. The freelance would get paid only on the ones who signed up. Which would be on the contract,even if in very small print.

This one did'nt get off the drawing board. Along with a similar one that involved 'lookalikes'.
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Sign Post To Fortune

This was around late 90`s early 2000`s. Saw  funny sign photographs, by some Semi, or Pro photographer either in a Photography magazine or a book.  £ $ £ $ £ $ symbols went off in my head, I can do that!

Of course these were original funny photographs of road names, directions, that a well rehearsed Candid Photographer had taken, he or she had a relationship with the subject, or vica versa. But my little brain thought I could doctor signs myself to be funny, I could print them out on T Shirts and Transfer them with an inkjet printer onto Mugs. Ok, got a bit worried about getting caught putting graffiti on road signs ,so worked out different, overcomplicated ways of doing it photographically. This was pre-digital,for me, I didn't even have a computer or printer of my own, but I was reading about all the fantastic printing paper and media, and the cool new software that was allowing people to alter photographs, take stuff away from their digital images, add stuff, change them to works of art and print onto anything. I was still messing about in the dark, literally (darkroom, get it?) Or copying stuff on stands.

Finally I realised if I took an ordinary photographic print of a road name, or information board and drew on it with pen, then rephotographed it, it looked like someone had written a rather amusing ditty on the board originally and I had wandered upon it by chance, took out my ever present Camera and captured it.  Oh how I laughed, those long summer evenings. . .

I will have to find those old photographs, odd road names that I  added to, rude interpretations of traffic directions. Quite a collection I amassed, racking up costs in film, developing, printing and posting. Getting my photographs developed over the counter was way too expensive, until one day, oh look, something more shiney over there. . .and the masterpieces of photographic brilliance and ingenuity, got put in a drawer.

wish i had taken these lessons

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3D

Ah yes 3D,did they see me,or both of me coming?

This was in the early 90`s. An american company called Nishika started advertising their launch in the U.K.

Get in first!

Oh I did,the whole kit for about £300. I was the first,maybe even the only one,after a while it fizzled out and the company retreated back to the U.S.-with my money!

Don`t know how far they got into Europe,only know that the Milton Keynes developing and processing plant stopped and you had to send your film to America.

I`m not bitter,or critisizing Nishika,their product may have made some people money. Indeed,as I said earlier,if I`d concentrated instead of product hopped,I may have made something of the opportunity. Is that enough grovelling to stop a team of yank legal eagles from stripping me to the bone?

The 3D pictures were ok and quite striking,if the rules of composition were followed. Some of them take pride of place,in a box,in the loft.

I still have the kit,tried to sell it once in Loot,no takers. May get it out again,will I ever learn?

Well I could have learned here

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Experiences

Some of the crazy things I tried to make money from photography included hiding a camera in a shopping trolley,with a cable release,to capture 'natural candids'.

Helium balloons and kites,for 'aerial photography'.

Running an ad in Amateur Photographer,(great magazine by the way),offering 'money from your camera' tips.

Hand tinting black and white prints,with a kit from Jessops,(great store),for negative effects,colour tinting and posteurisation,not sure if thats the right word,have to look it up,may be me who`s posteuring!

I will think of more later.

Instead of trying to find a shortcut.I should have learnt from the professionals.

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